Yesterday, Armenia’s government convened a cabinet session devoted to military issues.

The entire matter would have passed under the radar if not for the fact that the attendees, including the nations Prime Minister and Deputy Prime Minister, were all wearing camouflage army clothes.

Such a phenomenon warrants greater clarification. I mean, why show up at a cabinet session in the heart of Yerevan in army fatigues, especially the camouflage variety? Permit me to elucidate further.

First off, the government should be aware that the ancient Greeks were the first to come up with the idea of wearing military uniforms in order to differentiate the warring sides in the midst of battle.

As guns developed (their accuracy and range), so too did military dress. Naturally, the aim was to have combatants blend in with the local surroundings (usually a combination of green and brown), and thus we have the khaki fatigues of today. The camouflage battledress of today’s soldiers is defensive in nature and is meant to conceal.

Government in the trenches?

Had yesterday’s cabinet session taken place in border trenches or even in border villages, wearing camouflage would make sense. But the meeting took place in downtown Yerevan, in the Government Building. I don’t really think that the officials were in the crosshairs of enemy sharpshooters.

Thus, I can only assume that our government officials wore camouflage fatigues merely for demonstrative purposes. But I have a hard time understanding what they wanted to demonstrate.

Diagnosis

Leaving aside for the moment the question as to what right officials who have never served in the military were wearing fatigues emblazoned with the “Armenian Army” insignia, or how they got their hands on these uniforms, let me now turn to the issue’s medical aspect.

While I am not a psychologist, it is clear to me that if an individual shows up at a cabinet session wearing attire that has nothing to do with his office, than that person is slightly off kilter.

I mean, they could have showed up wearing swimsuits, Bengal Lancers cavalry uniforms, or even Mayan traditional dress.

However, since the government officials preferred to attend the session wearing defensive military camouflage, we can conclude that one of the following three factors came into play.

Schizophrenia – The government officials felt a collective urge to prove that they were indeed “military men”, and thus the need to wear the fatigues.

Infantilism – The government officials have never matured out of childhood, and instead of playing with toy guns in the park they now go out in public wearing military battledress.

Complex of Being Pursued – The government officials are given to believe that they are being targeted by sharpshooters and thus they wear camouflage.

This is one of those rare incidents when the government’s actions were more laughable than a reason to weep.

Listen to me dear ministers who have never done military service - you could have shown up to the meeting butt naked; doing so wouldn’t have made a whole lot of difference for the country.

However, you have no right to wear the uniform emblazoned with the insignia “Armenian Army”.