The widow of writer Gurgen Mahari survives on 30,000 AMD per month

Antonina Mahari paces back and forth in the freezing apartment. She’s bundled up in as many layers of clothes as possible.

Even inside, she wears gloves and a hat. The average temperature of the well-maintained apartment, left untouched since the death of her husband Gurgen Mahari in 1969, is around zero centigrade.

“When it gets really cold, I switch on a heater in the bedroom. I probably turn it on after New Years,” says Mrs. Antonina. She sometimes sleeps in a neighbor’s apartment to stay warm.

The curtains are now shredded and threadbare from wear. They, like most of the furnishings in the apartment, have remained untouched since her famous husband passed away all those years ago.

“Do you see what terrible doors I have? But they are holy and legendary doors for me. Your classical figures have knocked on these doors to come and visit Gurgen Mahari. The great writer himself knocked on these doors. I was always waiting for him. I do not want doors of gold,” says Mrs. Antonina.

Antonina Mahari, a Lithuanian by birth, survives on 30,000 AMD ($74) per month. She receives a monthly pension of 15,000 and a welfare allowance in the same amount since she lives way below the official poverty line.  

Right now, she pays 3,000 AMD in monthly utility bills. When she turns on the electric heater, the electric bill will more than triple.

Despite her own very limited means, Mrs. Antonina says there are people in much more dire straits than her. “One must have a conscience. Sometimes, when I can afford to, I’ll give them 1,000 AMD to tide them over. I’d be embarrassed to go and apply for assistance when there are others around worse off than me,” she says.

No one from the Lithuanian Embassy in Armenia or from Armenia’s Ministry of Culture has come to visit her. Nevertheless, Mrs. Antonia is happy that the ministry placed an order for the publication of her book.

After the death of her husband, she wanted to keep his spirit alive. She’s transformed the living room into a kind of mini-museum with photos, books and other memorabilia.

“I wanted to keep his memory alive. Those who visit say that it’s as if Gurgen is here in this apartment and that he’ll walk through the door at any moment. His old pals were really impressed,” she said.

The two met in a Siberian prison camp

Antonina Mahari (née Povilaytinen), then a student at the Law Faculty, and Gurgen Mahari (Ajemian), first met in Siberia.

“I was very young when they arrested me. What followed was ten years in jail. I had turned 29 by the time I was released. I was arrested for belonging to an underground students’ group called Freedom for Lithuania. What was wrong with a bunch of students wanting freedom for Lithuania? The Soviet authorities persecuted us and wanted to erase the Baltic States. There was a great Armenian painter there as well, Ashot Sanamyan. He had been arrested for membership in the Independent Armenia secret organization and spent twenty years in prison. I have written about him too,” says Antonina Mahari.

Gurgen Mahari had been arrested and charged for belonging to a “terrorist” organization that was plotting to kill Lavrentii Beria, Stalin’s notorious police chief. His wife says that Mahari didn’t even have it in him to hold a rifle.

“When we met, he was tending a flock of pigs. He later became seriously ill. Even the doctors had given up hope. They had transferred him to a hospice to die. Mahari sent me a note to come to his bedside. I went and did whatever I could to take care of him. He would say, “Let me just spend one year with you, just one year’. I wished for the same, but we wound up spending sixteen years together. He was still young when he died,” Antonina Mahari said.

She spent ten years in Siberia and Gurgen Mahari survived for seventeen. They were released together. They married in Siberia and then moved to Armenia.

“You are under the heel of the Russians”

Mrs. Antonina hasn’t been back to her native Lithuania ever since Armenia regained its independence. The travel costs have skyrocketed and she now needs special documents and an invitation.

“I love Armenia and don’t want anything bad to happen here,” she says, adding that there is kindness and sincerity in the people here, just like in her neighbors.

But she abhors the jealousy and hatred towards most everything that people in Armenia exhibit.

Mrs. Antonina also feels sad that Armenia still retains cultural influences from Russia.

In the rest of the world, people greet each other as Mr. or Mrs., but here in Armenia they address her as “Antonina Mikhaylovna”. This infuriates her.

“Why do they use this Russian expression here in Armenia? I want to locate the Armenian ‘me’”, she exclaims.

Antonina is also surprised that guests used to come and ask for Russian books since they couldn’t properly read Armenian. She says that she and her husband were against parents sending their kids to Russian and not Armenian schools. Even after the fall of the Soviet Union, some Armenians still prefer Russian schools.

“I am not in favor of this. You are under the heel of the Russians. How did the Russians help you when they were killing Armenians in Baku? You have no friends. Stay strong. I want your Armenian essence to soar,” says Antonina Mahari.

Steeled by the trials and tribulations of her life, Antonina is insulted when people only respect her as the wife of Gurgen Mahari.

“If I am not worthy of respect for who I am, then don’t respect me. Turn your gaze from me. And they do just that, by the way,” she says.

Antonina says she won’t be buying anything for New Years and will welcome in 2013 at home by herself.

At our conversation came to a close she added, “We celebrate the New Year because we have made it through alive. Many couldn’t wait and left while still young. Thus, we give thanks to God and may He bless the year to come.”

P.S. - Hetq first wrote about the plight of Antonina Mahari in a March 2010 article entitled “Antonina Mahari: “Like iron, I have been forged in the cauldron of many storms”